Monday, August 29, 2005

The Fountain of Youth (or at least a sure-fire to ferget you are getting older by the minute)

Hells bells, I have discovered the fountain of youth - Peppermint Schnapps! It is the perfect drink. It only costs $11.25 for a big ole' bottle. You stick it in your freezer, back behind all those brussel sprouts and endame beans, 'cause NOBODY will be movin those items. Then when your house is full of puking preteens, bitchy teens, and gee-tar playing old men, you just sneak into the ole' freezer and pour yerself just a little snort. It looks like water and it freshens ure breath, all at the same time! Golly, for all I know it also whitens my teeth and keeps me regular! Ferget all that Crystal light fuzzy peach stuff, this is the REAL MCCOY!!! And the best part is you only need a little sip so you don't end up all bloated with a headache the next morning.

See'in how the Kocureks called and invited themselves to come spend the night this weekend, you can be shore that I'll be a makin a run to the neighborhood package store in my anonymous econo-box car tomorow. I might even expand my horizons and try some new flavers. Why, if I'm not wrong, my shoulder is even showin some improvement thanks to this newly discovered magic water. Try some today and be shore to let me know if you don't feel yunger yurself!!

1 comment:

yo mama said...

Yo Mama kaint talk much now since I B en route to pkg. store 4 my schnapps, keep it N the freezer and that colorless coconut medicine unner the sink. I am redy 4 whatever mite happen. Kaint take those new vitamins and drink too so jes think I drink insted.

Do you think Yo Mama thinking rite?