Fatty's Food Issue: No Teeth Required

My crow's feet are so deep that I figure I better jack up the heater, get me a remote with ginormous buttons, and start planning a diet that requires no teeth. Bumpus taught me how to make this, and damn, it is GOOD! Notice that eating it involves special procedures...

1. Take two of those huge shredded wheat and put them on a sheet of foil in your toaster oven.
2. Spread with 1 tablespoon of butter or margarine each (due to current and future dietary restrictions, we use Smart Balance Light).
3. Sprinkle each with about 1/4 tsp sugar.
4. Put under the broiler under the edges get brown but not burned.
5. Remove butter sugar fiber biscuits to a bowl.
6. Pour in enough milk so it comes about 1/2 way up into the biscuit.
7. Take your spoon and drizzle a little of the milk on top of each.
8. Let sit for 37.25 seconds.
9. Tip the bowl up and drink the milk.
10. Eat the biscuits.

Holy cow these are good.