Chapter 8, The Last:Banished from the RepublicansBecause I Support Euthanasia

Harbinger of Death
Originally uploaded by Fatty Will Rule the World!.

Then, within three hours of the double murder, the phone rang. Way back when this all started, Boudreax had wanted a turtle, so I had asked a friend of ours who works around ponds, if he would get me one. He had one. I checked out the breed on the internet and found it to be an aquatic turtle that feeds on plants, algae, and carrion (dead meat, not luggage). Perfect. He and Fred, the lone surviving inhabitant of the tank, would get along just fine. He was delivered and dumped in the tank.

Within one hour, it became painfully apparent that Yertle here didn't know the difference between a heroic flying dragon fish and a side of beef. Fred was suddenly laying on the bottom of the tank with his long top fin chewed off. He was still alive but was obviously suffering, and I had been through five different types of food that Fred would not eat. Once he had tasted freedom, tropical flakes would not do.

So I said a little prayer to The Bob and sent Fred into the mouth of the Porcelain God.

The End.