U kan spot us a mile away

A fine machine it is
Originally uploaded by Annie Kaint Work No Mo.

Bet U don't be a-knowin that we B the onlee dis-tinguished members of that plase where we go on the boat, shall remain un-named case n-e nosy members b a-readin blogs 2-nite, that gotta V-hickle lik thisson with jes 3 wheels. It B a real antique and proud of it. Jes got threw a-paintin and washin it and U jes shud see us aridin round the kampus. Gonna get a cover 4 it Sattiday 2 keep it klean, klean, klean.

If U cum 2 C Yo Mama we take UK 4 a ride U won't 4-git

This B UR new cuzent, cats cuzent too

A loyal friend and new member
Originally uploaded by Annie Kaint Work No Mo.

Thot you wanna get a look at ur new relative in that north carolina state. His name b Cody and he be blind with them cataracts like Yo Mama got rid of. Bet Devil Dog luv him lik a brother, even tho he don't slobber. He be the sweetest and mos loving dog next to Lucy that I at the moment seem to be quainted with. He follows your voice so he nose where to go, and he sur kan find that dinner bowl.

Say hi to Yo Mama's new grand-doggie

Thisson got a nastie dis-po-sition

Lil iguana got some nerves of steel
Originally uploaded by Annie Kaint Work No Mo.

I ben ahearin bout iguanas that whip their tales round and hit lil kids and doggies and this nastie guy sur nose how 2-do it. Lucy don't like him atall cause she kan run at him and bark and he jes gives her dirtie looks and whips that tale. Thisson came all the way up to the Kaptain's bak door while the Kaptain wuz a watchin t.v. and watched the kaptain a watchin t.v.

Whadda U think about Yo Mama's new pet?

Wood U like one-a these 4 Christmas?

Grandpa iguana is a-gettin old
Originally uploaded by Annie Kaint Work No Mo.

Yessiree, Grandpa is a gettin old. U kan tel cause he gittin brown on the bodie. When he git mad, like when Yo Mama and Lucy run him off N-2 the water, he puffs up jes like a dinasore.
But he B smart, smarter than them lil ones that cum arount our place. Thisson nose to get the h--- out the way when Miss Lucy cums full speed to him, a-barking like an idiot.

Shud Yo Mama record the squawk Grandpa makes when he mad?

Jes look at him a-grittin his teeth !

The Kaptain is trying his best
Originally uploaded by Annie Kaint Work No Mo.

YES HE DID, my Kaptain held his own mongst them crazy kids, ex-wife, Yo Mama, the tatooed kid with long sleeves, 2 yr. old that eats only cookies, ice cream, cake and candy, a daughter in law on crutches, a daughter who is full of knowledge, her boyfriend from South America. Whole fam-damily was there and it wuz a glorious okashion with a-plenty to eat and lotsa dishes needin washin. Even got to eat sum stuff offa cardboard.

Yo Mama wisht 4 U 2 B there with herself.

WHAR UR YA, MAMA?

I'm kinda worried...it's been TWO WEEKS since we've heard from Yo Mama. Is she so busy sucking down jelly bellys and then scaring the neighborhood kids with her gasous nature that she does not have time to write?????

DANGER DANGER DANGER DANGER

BEAN BEANS THE MAGIC FRUIT

Ok everybody out there is cyber space - I'm a here to warn you that Sugar Free Jelly Belly Beans will make you fart worse than any other bean on this here planet!!!! The secret is....buy a little bag of these buggers (they got to be the sugar free ones) and eat the WHOLE DANG BAG! (Don't worry it is just two servings and the whole bag is only 160 calories). Then just sit back and let 'er rip!!! You'll be a scarin the pets and everybody who comes around you and soon you will be SITTIN AT A TABLE ALONE!!!! They are sure enough tasty and yummy and this will be a task that is easy to complete! I want anyone who reads this to try this little science experiment at their own house and report back here ASAP as to how fast the wallpaper fell off your walls and how many holes you blew through your big girl panties!

And Lo, His True Nature is Reviled...I Mean Revealed.

[No Further Comment Required.]
Originally uploaded by Fatty Will Rule the World!.

Moment of Vic-tree

Moment of Vic-tree
Originally uploaded by Fatty Will Rule the World!.

Against a host of enemy challenges, skinned knees, missing teeth, and a November dust-bowl of activity...after surviving to play three soccer games in one flippin' day!...after a double-overtime and sudden-death kick-o-rama...We vanquished the pickle people and WON THE COUNTY WIDE SOCCER TOURNAMENT!

I Ain't Skeered...
Originally uploaded by Fatty Will Rule the World!.

I LOVE TATERS!!!!

What the Hell is Going on Here?

What the Hell is Going on Here?
Originally uploaded by Fatty Will Rule the World!.

Is this that burning bush from the bible? (There's creams for that problem, you know...they talk about em all morning on TV.)

I ain't never seen nothing like this in my life. Who knew?

Big Rock, Little Kid

Studying History
Originally uploaded by Fatty Will Rule the World!.

Here's Boudreaux studying a WW I monument that sits in the gardens below the castle. He stood for a long time and read every word twice. I thought about Rufus, who would have been trying to push it over from the back.

Round 1: Country Comes to Town

Ach! It's an Old, Old Castle
Originally uploaded by Fatty Will Rule the World!.

Well, you knew I'd have to share. What else can you expect when you let three generations worth of boogers loose to fly on air-o-planes, ride on trains, and try to converse with a bunch of normal lookin' folks who jes don't seem tuh tawlk rite!?!

This one here is of the castle at Edinburgh. Some sort of building has sat on this spot for over 3,000 years. The oldest part of this castle was built around 1300 AD. That part is a chapel that sits on the high part of the structure. Inside the gates is a road that winds its way around full circle, going up hill all the time. On top is the chapel, the great fall, etc.

When we first arrived, we thought we'd tag on to one of those "tours leave here every 15 minutes" things. At the beginning, the pretty lady asked our big ol group of about 30: "Where is everyone from?" And a bunch of answers started being mumbled like "Germany," "France," "England," "Israel." Of course, I couldn't help myself. In my best East Texus-Damn-Straight-I-Voted-for-Bush-TWICE-YOU-PANSY-ASS-EUROWEENIES!, I yelled out "TEXUS! Course that's in the USA." I got all the crossways looks you would have expected.

Sheesh! I can't go all that way and not REPRESENT, can I?

El Dia Del Rufus

The Sweet Smell of Loot
Originally uploaded by Fatty Will Rule the World!.

Dear Mimi Yo Mama,

Thank you for the huge wad of bills you sent me through the mail. First I tossed it in the air and let them flutter down around me like fall foliage. Then Mom neatened em up and I took several BIG WHIFFS just to know what it felt like to be flithy. Once I had come to see myself fully as The Donald of East Texus, we loaded up and rampaged through the Damn Fine Dollar Store. They had just gotten their Christmas haul of plastic loot, and I spent a full 30 minutes studying every pop gun, can of Play Doh, race track, and Ken doll.

In the end, it was a remote control monster truck that stole my heart and my stash. But never fear, at my age, this is the perfect training for NASCAR.

Love,

Rufus, the Big Oh-Five

Overheard on All Hallow'd Eve

The Late Knights
Originally uploaded by Fatty Will Rule the World!.

[Knock knock...]

"TRICK OR TREAT SMELL MY [Mom yelling to interupt: YOU STOP THAT RIGHT NOW OR WE'RE GOING HOME!]...Can I have some candy, puh-leeeeeze?"

"Well, hello, you cute little guy! How old are you?"

"I'm FIVE years old, which means I can do A LOT of STUFF."

"Oh, I see! And I see you are dressed as a knight! What kind of knight are you?"

"A Late Knight."

"And do you protect your parents from dragons?"

"Who them? Oh my Dad...he's called Sir Toot-a-Lot."

"Oh, really?"

"Ye-ah...Sir Toot-a-Lot and the Late Knights. That's us."

"And who is that lady with you?"

"That? Oh, that's my Mom. She's Sir Beautiful-a-lot."

And lo, the boy lived to see another day.

Thought Maybe I Might Know Someone Who Would Like this for Christmas!!!

Santa is makin his list!!!

I just be a doin a little shoppin online and I found this little jewel that might come in mighty handy in a number of households - watch out - one might end up under YOUR tree!!!

There sumthin bout bein home ALONE

Off Annie J goes, Yo Mama not with-em
Originally uploaded by Annie Kaint Work No Mo.

Jes wanna let U girlies no that Yo Mama is a-sittin alone in the house, Hallaelujah The Kaptain and his boat drivin Friend by namma Frank left at 8:58 a.m. and will be a-driving that water trailer bout 5 hours. When they gits 1 1/2 hrs from there destination they B calling me and think I mite like 2 drive the car and the dog to the same place. I jes don no. Kinda wunderin how far I got git if I hed west n-stead be-4 they find me. Jes put the n-gines together 2 days ago. Wunder if they b workin out their in that ocean.

Sur is nice and quite here in this boarded up cave with the rat livin in the laundry room.

As the boat passed by the kaptain was a-hollering questions at Yo Mama

Wundering where the bandaids are
Originally uploaded by Annie Kaint Work No Mo.

Seems the Kaptain had cut his hand in the going-away-process and jes didn't no how 2 handle it. Like what duz one need 2 know? How to open a bandaid? It was a challenge 4 sure. As the boat passed by he was jes a-hollering at Yo Mama at the top of his lungs, thot he needed a bandaid and did't no where they wuz or what 2 do.

Yo Mama is at her wits end

4 a minit Yo Mama thot she wuz in Texas

This is living at its best
Originally uploaded by Annie Kaint Work No Mo.

When times get tough, the tough do no how 2 git goin. Them folks at Southport jes got out their fish and shrimp and oysters and whatever else be decaying in that frigerator and set up some sorta pit out front and went rite on with there busyness. Probly the only place a-serving the day after Wilma came to call. Did my heart and soul good 2 see it all.

Sur thot I was in TX for a minite, or meybe even Mary-land, Yo Mama did.

Cheerio and Pip Pip

This B my friend DL who taught me lotsa stuff
Originally uploaded by Annie Kaint Work No Mo.

Sum people jes smarter than other folks and my friend DL is among them smartest ones. He nose bout all there is 2 no about the great state nown as Mary-land. It weren't a buncha yankees a-tall, them wuz southerners. I new there wuz a good reason I liket 2 go there. N E way, DL gets all dressed up in this garb and U kan chose what walking tour U wanna go on.
He tells it like it is and U go home athinking U sorta smart 2. Aint't he a cute one? He also serves us that lst meal of the day at the B&B and even 1 time I kaught him aloading the dishwasher. Probably puts the garbage down the rite side of the sink too. Wunder if he gets dizzy?

Yo Mama wants 2 no iffin U want his phone number.

I Musta been from Mary-land long ago

Bet U kan read it jes like I kan
Originally uploaded by Annie Kaint Work No Mo.

I think I jes finded my roots 4 sure.
I kan unnerstand what this article title all about and bet U kan too. Them folks in Mary-land sur do speak my linguistics. This wuz a featured feature in the plate glass winder of the Maryland State House. DL took me 2 see it and I wuz charmed, to B sure.

Are you charmed like Yo Mama?

Kan U tell Yo Mama what is wrong here?

Will U B the WINNER?
Originally uploaded by Annie Kaint Work No Mo.

Whilst a-strolling about with my new friend DL, we visited upon this flag in the Maryland State House ... kan U tell me what is wrong with it? Iffin U B the 1st one to notice, U will B the winner !!!!

Yo Mama didn't git it at first either, jes keep a-studying it or meybe ask 1 of your kids.