Wednesday, October 08, 2008

Dear CPS,
I hereby confess to scaring the shit out of my daughter.
Love,
Fatty

A few weeks ago, Magoo and I were having our evening shower party, where I end up sitting on the floor of the shower while she plays with all the toys I manage to cram in there, much to Bumpus's sha-grin.

We ended up playing a game where I would hide my eyes with my hands, Magoo would pour water from a cup over my shoulder/leg/head, and I would open my hands and yell BOO! Think of a shower version peek-a-boo and you have the idea. So this went on for some time, probably a dozen rounds, and she was having a blast, shrieking and laughing.

I went for another round, closed my eyes, felt the water pour over my shoulder, and yelled "BOO!" She screamed and laughed and then look absolutely shocked. Her face froze and she stood very still. Then she turned around and looked down. She had pooped. She was MORT-ee-FIDE.

Now, let me take a little side trip here to say that each of my boys had one poop-in-the-tub incident. I was mortified, but each of them at their own point (around 2 years old) thought is was hilarious. They laughed and pointed and laughed some more. I got out the friggin' bleach and went to work on the e-coli.

Poor Magoo. She was more ashamed than I have ever seen her look. Of course, I immediately started saying "It's okay, baby, let's just clean it up." Well, actually, I said that right after I said "Wait. Stand real still. Don't move." It was about the size of a small cat turd (TMI!!!), so I got it with some tissue, flushed it, and then (without Magoo in the shower, of course, you silly CPS people) did the bleach clean up. She was very quiet this whole time, but I was having a hard time not jiggling...I mean giggling...that, too.

We dried off, got dressed, and went out to tell Bumpus. I told the story, while she continued to look sheepish. I gave her kisses and told her it was okay. Finally, she looked at me very sternly. She may have even raised her little chubby finger and wagged it at me a little. In a very annoyed tone, she finally spoke: "No more scare baby, mama. No BOO. Boo Baby POOP!"

This lecture continued for the next 10 minutes.

1 comment:

Cin said...

Poor baby. That was hilarious though!